A Life On The Spectrum

It is now called Autism Spectrum Disorder which is too wide for me as an Aspie or someone who has Asperger’s disorder and I was diagnosed when I was 27.

Most of my family does not know I have this because they will use bible quotes to justify that I am in the wrong for something. I am already on the outs with them since I do not go to church and they have told me I am going to hell.

My worst problem is the sensory overload, that is what causes my “melt downs” a.k.a. panic attack for me. The sensory issues then lead me down a road where I want to get away from that noise and retreat in to myself. This will lead to an extreme fixation on something a.k.a. what you become an expert then. Due to the fact that you seek comfort within your expert activity, you do not want to go out and socialize. You not wanting to go out can lead to ┬áno self esteem and depression. It is an everlasting cycle.

My Asperger’s also has me in treatment for major depressive disorder and severe social anxiety disorder with a side dose or medication.

So, children and adults get the stereotypes with being on the spectrum for all of the wrong reasons and as one of my friends told me, she judges and sayes she jurges their behavior in public because they should be seen and not herd. As far as she is concerned, it is too much of an annoyance to her to be in the presence of a child who is having a melt down. This is made worse by the fact she is a special needs teacher and I told her she should not be teaching these type of kids if you have a problem with them. They cannot all be coped up in the house outside of school, life happens and you can not always have someone to babysit to go out grocery shoping or you bring the kid into the drug store with you after getting home from the doctor to get a perscription.

Here is a thought to all who do not know someone who is on the spectrum or even have a tie to one. Try to walk a mile in the kid’s shoe or even the adult who has it or even better, the parent with a child who is on the spectrum. It can be hell and I do not wish this on my own worse enemy.

 

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